The Inaugral Blog

Okay, so basically, I have decided that I need some accountability in my life. Pathetic? The answer is yes, but it is what it is! I have friends with blogs - some insanely hilarious and awesome (www.pregnantbrainvomit.blogspot.com), some simply an easy way to communicate with friends and family without having to call or e-mail them all individually, and some an online spiritual journal. I need the latter. I hear people talk about what the Lord is teaching them and the Biblical lessons they are learning from life at the moment and it so hard for me to admit this to the entire world, but it's been a long time since I have been the one able to say such words. I recall many times in life when I was so deeply enthralled with God's Word and it's relevance in my life and absolutely loving the things that He would teach me. Sadly, that's not me right now. I feel like I am sort of in survival mode or something and I can't shake it. Don't get me wrong - I love the Lord with all my heart and He still teaches me things all of the time, but I've not been seeking out that teaching. I haven't been intimate with the Lord. I haven't been caught up with who He is and what His Word says and all that that entails. Thus, the reason for this blog. I want this to be my online spiritual journal, but in order for it to actually hold me accountable - I'm gonna have to tell someone about it. That's the hard part. I like to fool everyone around me into thinking that I've got it all together and always have had. I dont' know how good of a job I've actually been doing with that, but that's all out the window when I open myself up like this. It's easy for some people, but not so much for me. I do think it's necessary, though. I want to be the person God wants me to be. I want to be the wife Lance deserves and the mother Boston deserves. So, here it begins. Where will the Lord take me? I'm pretty excited about that actually. I'm ready to be completely honest with myself, with the Lord, and with the world wide web! WOW!